Let It Go: Releasing God's Blessings in Your Life

By Taisa Efseaff Maffey

For a while now, a strange kind of theme has been coming up repeatedly in my life, but I didn’t know how to process it until very recently.  One after another lately, I’ve had to watch several people I care about making some really bad decisions in their lives.  More specifically, these are fellow Christians who have chosen to walk away from what they’ve previously known to be right in order to pursue their own whims and desires, regardless of the cost or consequences.

If you’ve ever had a loved one make truly destructive decisions, you know how hard it is to stand by and watch.  You try to reach out to them in love and give them advice or resources to help, but your words fall on deaf ears.  Then you just want to yell at the person, “Don’t you see what’s going on?!  If you would just [fill in the blank], your situation would improve and you would be so much better off!”  But if you’ve ever tried that tactic, you know it doesn’t do any good either.

It’s even worse when you witness firsthand the repercussions of those bad decisions.  You can see the harm they’re causing themselves and others.  You watch them dig themselves deeper and deeper into a hole that becomes increasingly difficult to climb out of.  The more they insist on doing what they’re doing, the further they are from what they want most.  They’re left unsatisfied.  Happiness evades them.  They may even become depressed.  But they still refuse to give up and change directions.

As a bystander, this behavior is extremely frustrating.  But my point in bringing all this up is actually not to address how to go about fixing those other people.  For better or worse, every adult is free to make their own choices, and experience has taught me there’s little any of us can do to affect their decisions.  But we do have control over our own.

Rather than focusing our attention on what other people are doing or not doing, I want us to seriously consider the decisions we make, especially whether we are making decisions that hinder us and keep us from experiencing God’s best in our lives.  Maybe we’re making decisions that we don’t personally see as being all that bad, much less destructive, by comparison to all those other people.  Let’s be honest: It’s easy to find ways to justify the things that we do.  We may even have convinced ourselves the decisions we make are logical and good.  But as they say, the proof is in the pudding.  Do the decisions we make bring God’s blessings and contribute to our wellbeing and the wellbeing of the people in our lives?  Or do they bring frustration, strife, pain, or dysfunction, even in seemingly small ways?

Sometimes, the answer is obvious.  Eating whatever we want, as much as we want, keeps us from a healthy weight and ultimately contributes to serious health problems.  Spending money irresponsibly or trying to sustain a standard of living we can’t afford leads us into debt and causes chronic stress.  Acting selfishly and inconsiderately causes rifts in our relationships and keeps people from wanting to be around us.  These are pretty basic examples of cause and effect with regard to our actions.

But other times the answer is harder to see because the effects of our decisions are much more subtle.  Personally, I find there are two red flags in particular that warn me when I’m making a decision that’s not in line with God’s will for me and/or I’m thwarting God’s work and blessing in my life.

The first red flag is what I call Resistance.  (I touched on this idea before in another post I called “The Best Prayer I Ever Prayed.”)  With Resistance, the Biblical example that immediately comes to mind is of Apostle Paul and Timothy in the New Testament, when they decide to travel to Asia Minor (known as modern day Turkey) to preach the Gospel:

“Now when they had gone through Phrygia and the region of Galatia, they were forbidden by the Holy Spirit to preach the word in Asia.  After they had come to Mysia, they tried to go into Bithynia, but the Spirit did not permit them.  So passing by Mysia, they came down to Troas.  And a vision appeared to Paul in the night. A man of Macedonia stood and pleaded with him, saying, ‘Come over to Macedonia and help us.’  Now after he had seen the vision, immediately we sought to go to Macedonia, concluding that the Lord had called us to preach the gospel to them.”  (Acts 16:6-10) (emphasis added)

I find this account fascinating.  It doesn’t say exactly how Paul and Timothy were prevented from going into Bithynia, but however it played out practically, the bottom line is they met Resistance when they made this particular decision.  Was their decision bad?  Nope.  They seem to have had the best of intentions to share the Good News of eternal salvation through Jesus Christ with people who they thought needed to hear it.  But God clearly had another plan in mind for them.

Have you ever experienced Resistance to a decision or plan you’ve made?  A decision or plan that seemed like a good idea, but – despite your best intentions and efforts – refused to pan out.  You thought it was what you were supposed to do.  It made the most sense.  Maybe this decision or course of action even worked really well for someone else you knew, but when YOU tried, it was just. not. happening.

But not only was it just not happening, this plan you made may have caused you serious grief.  The more you tried to make it happen, the more elusive were the results you desired and the more frustrated and discouraged you became.

Don’t look at moments like these as failures but rather learn to identify Resistance early on and receive it as direction from God.  If He is blocking off one way, then He’s most likely wanting you to go a different way.  As the Reverend Mother in The Sound of Music says, “When the Lord closes a door, somewhere He opens a window.”

Unfortunately, what often happens is we keep knocking on the closed door, waiting for it and willing it to open.  Some of us end up pounding on that door, determined to break it down if need be, so we can get whatever it is on the other side that we want.  This is a big mistake.  Respect the closed door.  If the Lord’s not allowing one of your decisions or plans to succeed, then He must have something else, something better, in mind for you.  Look for the open window.

“‘For My thoughts are not your thoughts,

Nor are your ways My ways,’ says the Lord.
‘For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.’”
(Isaiah 55:8-9)

“Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying,
‘This is the way, walk in it,’
Whenever you turn to the right hand
Or whenever you turn to the left.”
(Isaiah 30:21)

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.”
(Proverbs 3:5-6)

The second red flag that warns me when I’m preventing God from accomplishing His perfect will in my life is what I call The Clenched Fist.  The Clenched Fist is when we hold onto something so tightly that our hands are not open to receive from the Lord.  Generally, the thing we are clenching so tightly and refusing to let go of is something that’s not good for us, whether we understand why or not.  Often, it’s a substandard, second-rate, super lame imitation of the real thing we desire most, but we’re too afraid to let it go.  Why?  Because it’s a safety blanket, a coping mechanism, a way of avoiding or numbing pain, or it’s the closest we’ve come to feeling happiness or peace.  But it’s not real happiness.  And there is no peace.

The best illustration I have for The Clenched Fist doesn’t come from the Bible but from J. R. R. Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings.  I’ve included a short clip from the movie for your viewing pleasure:

Here’s a short list of some of the common things we hold onto.  As you read through, consider if there’s something God may be asking you to let go of in order to experience His best in your life:

Ambition
Anger
Disappointments
Envy
Expectations
Fear
Finances

Grief

Grudges

Hardheartedness

Pain
Perfection
Plans
Pride
Problems
Regrets
Selfishness
Self-sufficiency
Sin
Standard of living
Unbiblical relationships

For the record, sometimes the things we hold onto aren’t inherently bad at all.  But a problem for sure exists if we are ever unwilling to let go because we’re not trusting the Lord to fulfill our needs and do what’s best for us, in His perfect timing and perfect way.  Anything we attempt to do or hold onto by our own will and strength comes so far short of what God can do when we surrender everything to Him and rely on Him alone.

So how about it?  Are you willing to let go of whatever may be holding you back from receiving God’s best in your life?  If you’re still not there, here’s my big finish: PROMISE after PROMISE from God’s Word that He is good and truly seeks to bless those who trust in Him...

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

“Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good;
Blessed is the man who trusts in Him!
Oh, fear the Lord, you His saints!
There is no want to those who fear Him.
The young lions lack and suffer hunger;
But those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.”
(Psalm 34:8-10)

“For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
The Lord will give grace and glory;
No good thing will He withhold
From those who walk uprightly.
O Lord of hosts,
Blessed is the man who trusts in You!”
(Psalm 84:11-12)

“Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?  Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent?  If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!”  (Matthew 7:9-11)

“God is my strength and power,
And He makes my way perfect.
He makes my feet like the feet of deer,
And sets me on my high places.”
(2 Samuel 22:33-34)

“The Lord upholds all who fall,
And raises up all who are bowed down.
The eyes of all look expectantly to You,
And You give them their food in due season.
You open Your hand
And satisfy the desire of every living thing.”
(Psalm 145:14-16)

“The Lord is righteous in all His ways,
Gracious in all His works.
The Lord is near to all who call upon Him,
To all who call upon Him in truth.
He will fulfill the desire of those who fear Him;
He also will hear their cry and save them.”
(Psalm 145:17-19)

“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”  (Ephesians 3:20-21)